NEVER
SAY NEVER
Growing up in the South Bronx, I saw many things that most people only see while watching a movie or television.
There is the sweet memory of an organ grinder who stood below our window squeezing out his tunes, later sending his little green monkey dressed in a bell hop uniform with shiny round brass buttons to climb up our fire escape in order to collect the change my parents would toss into his little red cap.
The day came when I never saw the organ grinder or his monkey again.
They had been replaced by young teen-agers breathing into paper bags which covered their nose and mouths. This was a sign of the changes in time.
My parents did not allow me to go out and play anymore unless they were standing outside chatting with neighbors, reading the paper or flipping through a magazine.
I recall when the nice neighborhood community where I grew up in changed.
The police officers who wore white gloves and served as crossing guards for the children to get to school safely were replaced by the white powder named, heroin who stole our safety away and threatened us with death.
When the 60's rolled out and the 70's came in. I was now a teen-ager and saw many of my friends drop out of high school to later learn that they had died of a drug overdose and it frightened me. I would never use drugs.
I would never try something that while standing upright, would make my eyes close, my mouth hang, my voice slur and cause my knees to bend, suctioning in my torso lower and lower towards the ground into a squatting position and yet never falling to the ground.
I felt bad for the parents of those friends who had died of a drug related cause. Back then, it stigmatized and disgraced the remaining family members.
To think of it now, one would believe they had a Scarlett Letter sewn onto their clothing while in public.
I would never become an addict and be spoken of in the past tense, referred to as the one who died of a drug overdose. How humiliating!
Smoking was cool back then. Almost all the grown-ups smoked. Why, even Father Connolly and Father McDonald smoked!
One of TVs favorite dad's could be seen occasionally puffing away on The Andy Griffith Show (1960-1968). Both Dick Van Dyke and Mary Tyler Moore smoked Kent Cigarettes in commercials on The Dick Van Dyke Show (1961-1966). And unbelievable but true is the fact that The Flintstones (1960-1966) had a tobacco brand as a key sponsor for a time. There were even commercials which showed the animated characters smoking Winston cigarettes.
Remember, Joe Camel, also known as Joe Suave and Joe Cool? Yeas, the ugly camel cartoon promoting Camel cigarettes which teenagers dubbed as, chest breakers; and who can forget the slogans made popular by television, radio and print publications?
"You've Come a Long Way, Baby" (Virginia Slims), "Come to where the flavor is" (Marlboro), "Blow some my way" (Chesterfield), "I'd rather fight than switch" (Tarreyton), Winston tastes good like a cigarette should" (Winston) and dozens of other snazzy catch phrases bombarded millions for years; even though one was more ridiculous than the last, the most laughable had to be L & M's claim that it was "Just what the doctor ordered."
Guess grown-ups were never educated enough to experiment on products that were to be ingested before releasing them to the public back then.
Never, did I think that cigarettes were also a cunning deceitful drug camouflaged by clever marketing to lure, capture and kill as heroin did!
Never imagined that while watching all the ugly as I smoked, that I too was becoming an addict, something I vowed never to become.
Nicotine is a drug and
cigarette smoking is an addiction which I have had for 30 years and am still
battling to end. Never say never.
Lesson learned:
Never say never.
Lesson learned:
Never say never.
That's the way I C it
Click On Lips And You Get A Kiss
A Letter To The One I thought My Friend
MY LONG TERM FRIEND
WHO HAS ALWAYS BEEN THERE FOR ME.
WE ARE APPROACHING OUR RUBY RED ANNIVERSARY,
SYMBOLIC OF 40 YEARS TOGETHER.
OUR BOND IS NOT AS STRONG AS IT WAS;
TIME SOMETIMES DOES THAT.
YOU HAVE CELEBRATED WITH ME WHEN I WAS ELATED
AND COMFORTED ME WHEN MISERABLE.
WHEN OTHERS TOLD ME YOU WERE NO GOOD,
I DEFENDED YOU ADAMANTLY;
THOUGH KNOWING THEY WERE RIGHT.
I JUST COULD NOT MANAGE WITHOUT YOU
AND WOULD DO ANYTHING TO KEEP YOU WITH ME.
AT TIMES, I SILENTLY WONDERED IF
YOU WERE TOXIC TO ME BUT
HERE YOU ARE, STILL BY MY SIDE, STILL WITHIN ME AND
I, STILL CRAVING YOU.
I DO NOT LOVE YOU BUT I NEED YOU.
MY SUSPICIONS WERE CONFIRMED WHEN
OTHERS EXPRESSED THEIR BELIEF THAT MY DEMISE
WILL BE CAUSED BY YOU.
IF SO,
WILL IT BE BECAUSE I USED YOU
OR BECAUSE YOU
USED ME?
ALL DEPENDS ON THE INDIVIDUAL PERSPECTIVE.
YOU HAVE BEEN THE ONLY ONE
TO PENETRATE ME DEEPER THAN ANY OTHER.
WHEN I DO APPROACH MY DEATH
I KNOW I YOU WILL NOT BE ALLOWED
TO BE ANYWHERE NEAR ME.
YOU WILL HAVE NO OTHER RECOURSE
BUT TO STAY AWAY AND I
WILL BE TOO WEAKENED TO EVEN HAVE A SAY.
I WILL LEAVE YOU WITH THIS.....
IF MY DEMISE IS IN FACT YOUR DOING,
I WANT ALL TO KNOW THAT
IT WAS MY OWN DECISION TO CONTINUE WITH YOU;
WELL AWARE OF THE POSSIBLE OUTCOME.
I TAKE TOTAL RESPONSIBILITY FOR MY LACK OF STRENGTH
AND FOR ALL THE TIMES I FAILED AT LETTING YOU GO.
YOUR GRIP ON ME WAS VERY STRONG GROWING STRONGER
WITH EACH YEAR.
I WOULD NEVER RECOMMEND YOU,
MY FRIEND TILL THE END,
TO ANOTHER LIVING BEING.
IN SPITE OF YOUR,
LOYAL COMPANIONSHIP,
I WANT ALL TO KNOW THAT YOU AND ALL OTHERS LIKE YOU,
PERSEVERE IN A POWER STRUGGLE IN ORDER
TO PREVAIL AND PRESERVE YOUR OWN EXISTENCE BY
SLOWLY EATING US AWAY FROM INSIDE OUT.
YOU AND YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY DESERVE,
CAPITOL PUNISHMENT
WHICH I KNOW WILL SOMEDAY HAPPEN.
Well, that's the way I C it.
By the way, The Marlboro Man Died of Lung Cancer
Three men who appeared in Marlboro advertisements - Wayne McLaren, David McLean and Dick Hammer - died of lung cancer, thus earning Marlboro cigarettes, specifically Marlboro Reds, the nickname "Cowboy killers".[11] McLaren testified in favor of anti-smoking legislation at the age of 51. During the time of McLaren's anti-smoking activism, Philip Morris denied that McLaren ever appeared in a Marlboro ad, a position it later amended to maintaining that while he did appear in ads, he was not the Marlboro Man, considering Winfield as the holder of that title. McLaren died before his 52nd birthday in 1992.[12][13]